Making things work...

The last time I made a post I was feeling awfully glum and gloomy. I felt confused, defeated and lost. Things in school can be really harsh at times and you just stand there and stare as things take over you. People make journeys from zeros to heroes, from nobodies to somebodies, while you are just invisible. A nobody. A mere shadow, nothing else.

Well, to my joy, I have taken control over such feelings. I have shut them up in the less-cared-of corner of my mind. So what, if I am a nobody in high school. So what, if the hot guys don't notice me. So what, if all the popular and pretty girls underestimate me. So what, if I am a pathetic loser?

I took some time and sorted out a lot of stuff. I thought over stuff, I learned to accept some harsh realities. Life really isn't as complicated as we make it. Allah has gifted us with a life which can be as simple and uncomplicated as anything, but we choose to make it difficult and incomprehensible. We choose to tie knots and cry over them. (Seriously I do that a lot!)

The problem is that I can't help it. I am this really over sensitive person, who thinks a lot. A LOT. Things are so over thought inside my head that it gets absolutely impossible to digest them the way they are. I turn a small knot into this one big knot.

So, anyway, with a huge help from my mom, my dad, my cousin Ash, my friends at school -I just love them- my blog readers: Galikea, Amy, 'fly in the web', and Ayak , I am finally almost over the sad stuff; for now. I never know when events might force me into transferring the sad thoughts back into obsessed part of my mind. But for now, I am as happy as birds in spring. I am chirpy! :)

So in the past few days, I figured some really important things, which got me back up again.

Here they are:

1, Those who believe in themselves the least, have the most to offer. -Kyle, from Kyle XY said this, and it just got me!-

2, Life is an occasion, rise to it. -from some movie-

3, Life is a monotony, unless you have lived as a loser once. That is what, being an All-Pakistani girls is all about. She goes through everything. And losing is a part of it. So I am happy that Allah has given me this chance to lose, so I rejoice to a greater extent when victory comes my way again. -I figured this out on my own-

4, People who matter, love me, unconditionally.

5, Allah has given me more than I can ask for.

6, I have been a great achiever in my past. I have been the editor of the school magazine. A paid writer in a newspaper. A position-holder in examinations. So what, if others take me as a loser, I have been bestowed with wonderful things to be proud of.

7, I have my life in front of me. Many opportunities and people, who'll always support me through thick and thin.

8, In this world, people are going through worse situations than I go through. Hunger and poverty. I think, it's selfish for me to grieve over my little, meaningless sorrows and ignore what others go through.

After all this, I don't think it's fair to remain glum and gloomy. Being happy is vital, I have big aims and big goals. If I go weak, I might not be able to make the journeys that lie ahead. So with many knots untied, I continue with my life, happy, satisfied and gratified. After all, this life is too short to cry over stuff, all the time!

Thanks for visiting my blog, even though I don't gt time to return your comments. I am awfully sorry about that.

Juniour year! Again!!

So I haven't posted about my crazy twisty weird junior year since I don't know when. I don't get enough time to write on, although there is sooo much going on!

To begin with, the 'Gothic inside' guy found out about my blog and that is the reason I had to shut my blog for a while. Then I had to make him promise not to access it and then make the blog accessible again. Now he has been asking me since then to let him read the blog. And all I can muster as an answer is 'no'. When he asks why, I say it's not just meant for people who belong to the place I babble all the time about. What else can I say "Oh no, I can't let you read it 'cos it is filled with crap regarding you and a lot of other people from junior year. Stuff that people are not supposed to know even exists in my mind." Yeah right! This online diary is SOOO not meant for people about whom it is written! It is filled with crap.

By the way, I think I should find another name for the 'Gothic inside' guy. He really ain't that Gothic although he is a little freaky. Okay not just a little, maybe a wee bit more than that. He does a really weird thing with his eyebrows, moving them frantically up and down; makes him look like a freak! And then he can contort his tongue in a really eerie way, that makes him look like a freak as well. Other than that he isn't that bad a guy, in fact he is a good friend now. So we'll just call him...ummm...okay why don't you people select a name. You have been reading about him for a long time. For now I'll just stick with 'Gothic inside' guy! 

Okay, so there are some guys in  my grade, who can get killed anytime this week! You wanna know why?? Simply because I HATE them so darn much, that I won't mind killing them. I mean what is their problem?? I don't talk to them, don't mingle up with them, never did anything bad to them..WHY THE HECK ARE THEY AFTER ME??? Freakin' assholes (sorry for that, but I am really pissed off!) One of them keeps pointing and laughing at me and mimes whatever I say!! And the other one, he is just bothered about every freakin' thing that I do! I hate even looking at their faces. They even seem like perverts to me! ASSHOLES!!

But I rather not fight anyone! So I just hide my menacing emotions for those abominable hideous dorks and move on as if I don't notice anything.

High School is soooo complicated!!!

Anyway, I created a Facebook badge, please add me. Talking of Facebook I think I have just had too much! I am turning into an addict. I keep playing Farmville all the time or socializing with people or taking stupid applications. I just can't stop, just can't freakin' stop. (Okay, is the word freakin' starting to sound a little weird to you!!) 

I interviewed for the English literary society today, I hope I get in. My interview went really good. The 'Gothic inside' guy auditioned with me as well. His interview went pretty good as well. Let's see what happens!

After this I'll visit some of my favorite blogs. I am thinking of giving my blog a makeover, please tell me what do you think of the idea, should I give it a make over or should I let it be. I have to study loads but I sooo don't feel like it. Please add me on Facebook! :)

Toodles!